More Ranting, More Ranting

Feel free to skip this post if you're tired of hearing me harp about this issue. Issue? Iowa? It's not even an issue worth anything (not that Iowa isn't worth anything either - it's a fine state, I'm sure). I don't even understand my own obsession with this late night thing. I don't even watch Jay or Conan or Dave or Jon Stewart or Craig Ferguson (who is the person I actually watch the most - on Youtube).

1) Hahahahaha.

2) Hollywood is saying they won't go on the Tonight Show when Jay Leno takes it over again. Great! Thank God! Jay, talk to the janitor from your show, or the gas station attendant, or your wife. All of those people are most likely far more interesting than the majority of celebrities.

3) Be more like you used to be. Be more like you were during the strike when a good deal of critics said you seemed spontaneous and acidic. Reinvent yourself.

4) Conan seems to have stopped making fun of Jay Leno himself and is sticking to jokes about NBC.

5) How is a masturbating bear more intelligent than Jay Leno? Please, someone, explain this logic to me. I must be really, really stupid.

6) I'm still mad at you, Jay. You should not have agreed to 11:35 in any of the capacities NBC offered it to you again. You are to blame there. You could have just waited out your contract or told them you would be a correspondent for the Today Show or something. You have a major obstacle of your own construction to overcome here. I'm rooting for you, nonetheless, and I don't understand why.

7) I'm pretty certain Jay Leno knew what Jimmy Kimmel was going to do on his show. I don't think he was blindsided at all. I wouldn't be surprised if he wrote some of those barbs Jimmy threw at him. However, Jimmy Kimmel's comment that he had kids to take care of and Jay Leno doesn't was really a lame argument - you're a millionaire and if you feel you need any more money than you have then you haven't been smart with your money. Plus, Jay has said his Tonight Show money is tied up in scholarships and charity donations. So, while Jimmy is arguing about money for his own kids Jay is giving his money to...other...people's...kids. He is EVIL!

8) Leno did not cross a line simply because he made fun of Letterman's affairs (which he claims are private but unfortunately are very public). Letterman crossed a line when he insinuated Leno should drop dead. That is far more personal - it is a wish of death on another person. Why is Letterman always praised for being "ascerbic" while Leno is criticized for being "low?" And I can't repeat it enough: Letterman cheated on his then live-in girlfriend. So, according to the media, feel free to cheat on your boyfriends and girlfriends because those relationsips do not matter.

More later, I'm sure.