The Short, Short Version #7

Ending the year 2013:


Fear:  My father wants to apply for a loan for a house through the Veteran's Association.  He is convinced they will give him a $200,000 loan.  Of course, no they won't, but that's beside the point.  He keeps talking about how he wants to put the house in my name, so that if anything happens I will have a house.  He talks about how he, my mother, and I will all live together and be happy.  The fear comes from the fact that I don't want to live with my parents forever.  But the last time I told him this, he started crying.  We were in the car together and I was talking about saving up to find an apartment, and when I looked over at him he was wiping tears away from his face.  He gets even more emotional now over little things.  I will have to tell him.  But how is he going to take it?

Disgust:  On Christmas Eve, we opened presents as my youngest niece was not going to be with us for long enough on Christmas Day for the whole family to be together.  It was fine.  At somewhere around 4:00 p.m. my sister got a phone call from her boyfriend.  They had to see each other because a day apart was JUST TOO MUCH.  These are 30- and 40-year-olds.  Anyway, the disgust comes from the fact that as soon as he came in, NO ONE ELSE MATTERED.  Apparently, that's how it goes.  My pregnant niece became upset, because this was supposed to be our family time.  But my sister didn't care.  She actually shoved my youngest niece off of her lap because she was in the boyfriend's way.  Boyfriend and Sister sat cuddling on the couch, making lovey-dovey noises and other displays.  When Boyfriend went to the bathroom, Sister Bear asked me if I thought he was cute, and when I said, "Sure," she got PISSED, and said, "You don't think he's cute.  Fine."  And thus the entire day was ruined.

Sadness:  My father just wants to be part of it all again.  When my mother plays games on Facebook, usually things like guessing a celebrity, song, or movie, and she gets stuck, he will search all over the internet trying to find the answer, usually going off of something she said that isn't even related to what she's trying to figure out.  He is clearly sad when he thinks he's found her answer and she's either moved on or the clue he was using was completely irrelevant.

Anger:  Fucking Janet got some chickens and she was supplying us with farm fresh eggs for $2 a carton.  That was very fair.  Well, not too long ago, while she was out to dinner with her husband, their dogs got into the chicken coop and killed about half their chickens.  That was sad, so that's not the 'anger' part.  So, Fucking Janet started going down the road to a neighbor's farm and asking him to supply us eggs in the mean time.  Fine, or so we thought.  They are NOT as good as Fucking Janet's eggs.  They are, in fact, worse than store-bought eggs.  That is not the 'anger' part.  We (meaning my boss and I) approached Fucking Janet and told her that we would wait for her eggs from now on, as she had just gotten new chickens but they weren't producing right now.  We said, "When you have enough for a carton to spare, we'll take turns buying your eggs."  Fucking Janet got very upset at this.  That is the 'anger' part.  Not the fact that she was upset, but the fact that she was upset when we were telling her that her eggs were superior and that we were willing to wait for quality eggs.  She just kept telling us we were being ridiculous.  That we needed to get over it.  And it's like, well, we don't have to buy eggs from him.  Or YOU, Fucking Janet.

Happiness:  Music.  Music...makes the people...come together. / Music...makes the bourgeoisie and the rebel.  A lot of my 'happiness' entries revolve around it.  So it should come as no surprise that my favorite gift this Christmas was Garth Brooks's Blame It All On My Roots boxed set.  I actually sat hugging it after I was done unwrapping my other presents.  When I first heard about it, and some of the songs on it, I began hearing those songs in my head but in Garth's voice.  Maggie May ceased to be sung by Rod Stewart.  The whole set is, as could be predicted, wonderful and brilliant and exciting.  Too bad Garth made his stupid deal with Walmart.  I even suspect he will not license his songs to mix radio stations at all.  That...is so disappointing.

Surprise:  I'm one of those people.  Who says, "When I was your age..." or, "Kids these days..."  Where is that line?  Is it an age we reach?  Is it a technological advancement that puts distance between 'us' and 'them?'  Is it because I constantly see five-year-olds playing with their iPhones while their parents blissfully ignore them? A former teenage employee of ours used to pretend to be my daughter because it could be true.  Another teenage employee said, "Since computers weren't invented until, like, the '90s..."  I just glared at her and shouted, "COMPUTERS WHERE INVENTED IN, LIKE, THE 1800s!"  One of my first memories is ET at the drive-in.  What are the comparable memories for the kids today?  Anyway, technology marches on, and since I used to be someone who felt I was on the cutting edge of it (video game systems, etc.), it surprises me when I feel so left out, or insulted, or nostalgic, or old.

Randomness:  I can't stand to watch HDTV.  It...isn't natural.  I'll be watching a TV show with my mom and sister, and I often have to turn away because I feel nauseated.  They think I'm crazy.  I'll say, "It moves like a soap opera."  And they just stare at me.  But I found out why!  And I was right.  Because soap operas use 48 frames per second, while TV shows before HDTV used only 24.  Now, HDTV runs at a much higher frame rate than old TV shows (that's what the 1080p, 360p, etc. means on Youtube videos).  It reminds me of when Tom and Jerry was directed by Gene Deitch and the animation was all fast, choppy, and weird.  Those old cartoons were the stuff of nightmares.